LITTERING RULES

Why Litter? Why Not?


Man, I love to throw shit out the window while I'm driving. There's nothing more satisfying than throwing garbage everywhere, and letting everything go to waste.

Seriously, I say it's time people felt good again about who they are: lazy bastards. Let's face it. People are lazy. For example, there's this guy at my work that comes in every day bragging about what a good parking spot he has. Oh wait, that's me. Getting a good parking spot kicks ass. Why should I walk a few extra feet to the door when I can drive around in the parking lot for 20 minutes until a good spot opens up? Walking is for suckers.

I thought of a good idea the other day: I wanted to take a big chunk of America and make it a garbage dump. We could call the garbage dump a state, and hire some jackass as governor. Governor jackass could then make a whole bunch of shitty changes like inviting the winter 2002 olympics to the state, and then he could implement a costly new light-rail system that nobody can use. Then, we could raise taxes to help fund all these crazy ideas, and call the state Utah. Man I hate Utah. What does this have to do with littering? Hell if I know.


317,370 environmentalists love this page.

Available now!
Join the mailing list here

Back to how much I rule... New Book Store Email Patreon
© 1997-2017 by Maddox